


Diamonds and Rust

by cosmotronic



Category: Ocean's 8 (2018)
Genre: Angst, F/F, Rough Sex, Sex Toys, Smut, Strap-Ons, sex as a coping mechanism
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-15
Updated: 2018-09-15
Packaged: 2019-07-12 18:42:33
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,140
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16001069
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cosmotronic/pseuds/cosmotronic
Summary: They never really put a name to what they had before. Never talked, never set out any rules or made any promises. They were good at keeping things vague.





	Diamonds and Rust

**Author's Note:**

> This is mostly just porn, garnished with angst. Or perhaps the other way around. Written to an endless loop of a special song by the same name.

 

“How long has it been?”

“You know how long.”

“So you never…”

“No.”

Lou kisses her way over and around one nipple. Playful, teasing with her lips and her questions.

“Not even once?”

“No.”

“Oh.”

Lou draws back with an exaggerated frown.

“Debbie. I figured you'd have been top dog inside.”

And Debbie can't help it, the small snort of incredulity.

“And what? Have a harem of prison bitches? To cater to my every…  _ urge _ ?”

Her lover has the sense to look chagrined, at least.

“Just a thought.”

Lou resumes her kisses, a slow meander down her torso.

Debbie wants to flip the question although she knows the answer, and she accepts it. They never really put a name to what they had before. Never talked, never set out any rules or made any promises. They were good at keeping things vague.  


But a corner of her heart had hoped beyond reason and her isolation has made that hope a burn.

She could drop the thought, could give Lou the simplest way out. But she doesn’t and it slips from her with the weight of an accusation she doesn’t mean.

“You did. You had lovers while I was inside.”

Lou stills. Sighs against her skin and looks up, looks her in the eye. She doesn't lie.

“A few.”

She knows what sort of lovers Lou will have been drawn to; the same fleeting encounters she enjoyed before they met, before they fell together. Casual, uncomplicated; no names and no strings. Strangers in bars and easy-going waitresses, a store clerk with a crush or a bored girlfriend. There will have been more than  _ a few _ .

“Does it bother you?”

It does.

“No.”

“I missed you, Debbie. A lot.”

A flicker of pain, there, and it’s the closest thing to a real feeling Lou has shared with Debbie since their reunion. But that’s not what they are here for, tonight. The talking and the promises can come later, if at all.

She shifts her body, opens her legs in invitation.

“Come on, partner. Show me what I’ve been missing.”

She doesn’t really realise  _ just how much _ she’s missed it until Lou shows her. And it’s not like she didn’t ease the long, lonely nights in confinement with the relief of her own hand, but she’s missed sex. The physical intimacy and the emotional nakedness that comes with baring yourself to another, scars and all.

And sweet fuck, she’s missed Lou like the moon misses the tides.

Lou is gentle between her thighs, tongue circling and dipping and dancing and she gasps. Twists her fingers into the soft silk of the sheets beneath her and feels like a queen after the poverty of her incarceration. She throws her head back and moans  _ more _ , a breath of command on her lips.

Her lover gives her more, fingers digging deep into Debbie’s thighs and pulling her arching body closer. Eager to taste, rougher now across her clit and releasing a moan into her flesh that makes her ache.

The hunger doesn’t surprise her. Debbie knows that Lou suffered a sentence of her own.

Her hips jerk and she knows she’s losing control. Lou grips tighter and bares her teeth and Debbie shatters. She cries out when she comes, maybe a name between the curses and the blasphemies. A name she hasn’t allowed herself to breathe for years; not even on the longest, loneliness of nights inside.

Lou kisses back up her body while Debbie lies flat on her back and floats on the last gasps of her orgasm. Minutes pass. She’s not expecting the question, when it comes.

“What about  _ him _ ?”

She stays very still and very quiet and Lou waits, lips above her heart. Lou deserves an answer and an explanation and an apology, one day, and Lou knows it.

It’s hard because her feelings there are a mess of knives and nooses and half-formed regrets. She hedges.

“That’s not the same thing -”

“No.”

“We -”

“You  _ left _ me, Debbie.”

“I know.”

It’s not an answer or an explanation or an apology and Debbie tastes the guilt ground into the tiny syllables.

Lou’s harder, after that. Checks to be sure, but she’s hard and rough and angry and she fucks Debbie like she wants her to feel it in every layer of her soul. An imprint, a reminder.

It’s been so long since she’s felt a touch like this and it’s like the first time, maybe. Or like stepping out from four walls of claustrophobic, stinking grey into the blinding brightness and a sky that never ends. Feeling her heart beat faster, faster, stumbling over itself because it’s too much, all at once and maybe she should panic but she doesn’t and instead she leaps, embraces the freedom.

It hurts, because it’s been so long. Debbie groans and rocks her hips down to meet the hurt. It’s a particular kind of agony, craved like it’s a drug, fire and ecstasy in her veins.

Lou bites her lip and moves her hand even more firmly, and Debbie swears and rocks her hips even more wildly and stares at Lou, dares her. Lou pushes. Another finger, unexpected. Lips, teeth on her skin, and occasionally a hand slapping down hard.

It’s the third slap that does it, high on her thigh, on top of the still-red fury of the last. Sharp agony above the ache and she peaks with her back arched high and a scream loud enough to break down walls. Her hands tearing at the sheets, reaching for her lover.

She’s panting, aching when she comes down but Lou is hushed and kneeling between her legs, barely a sweat on her brow. Fingers lingering, caressing. Eyes aside and words on the tip of her tongue, Debbie knows. Debbie knows what she wants to say, shout, scream. Debbie knows  _ her _ .

But Debbie wants to keep this carnal reverie going just a little longer. She’s missed Lou in every way a lover can be missed, but her body needs a simple fix tonight and she doesn’t want to stop until she’s sore and spent and satisfied. Until they are too tired to fight, maybe.

So she speaks first.

“You said you kept my stuff.”

“Yeah.”

“And you kept  _ our _ stuff? Anything catch your eye?”

“Oh. Oh  _ yeah _ . Wait here.”

The toy is thick and curved and juts proudly from Lou’s hips. It’s not the biggest one they ever tried but it’s enough after so long. Debbie licks her lips and tastes the sweat. Warm heat blooms inside her. She sits on the edge of the bed and beckons to Lou, hungry smiles and hooded eyes.

She glories when Lou pushes her flat onto the sheets, face down. The pleasure of anticipation is almost enough to forgive and forget the motive, keeping her away from Lou’s eyes and all the pain behind the lust.

Lou slides in slowly; she’s so wet and ready but the fullness takes her breath away, makes her tremble. Then out again, just as slowly. In, out, dragging, biting. The deliberate pace is almost cruel in its torment.

“Lou.”

Her partner gives her a few more slow, deep thrusts. Letting her adjust, letting her feel it, making her wait, making her beg.

“ _ Please. _ ”

Lou responds with a stinging slap on Debbie’s thigh. Curls firm fingertips into her skin, hard over the bones of her hips and slams forward. Once, twice, over and over, pulling her back onto the toy.  _ Fuck _ , Lou’s good at this.  _ Practiced _ . Takes Debbie hard and sure, finding the angle that will make her legs shake.

“Fuck. Fuck me.”

Debbie gasps encouragement over her shoulder. She was always the filthy screamer in bed, Lou the sweet talker. Once upon a time, anyway.

“Shut up, Debbie.”

She does. Turns her face into the pillow and squeezes her eyes shut and muffles her moans.

It doesn’t take long before her moans turn to screams and she’s coming, coming harder than her body is ready for and she snaps rigid, spine like a bow pulled back. Teeth gritted, her fingers and toes scrunched up tight she stiffens, orgasm pulsing outwards through every muscle and sinew.

Lou doesn’t stop after just one, pushes her over the edge into another before her muscles have even relaxed. One hand pushing Debbie firmly down and holding her steady, Lou pounds into her rough and dirty, the way Debbie loves it.

Damn it feels  _ good _ , colouring simple bliss over the muddled complexity of their reunion. She doesn’t want to think about that. She wants to be pleasured until she  _ can’t _ think.

She thrashes through another climax. She’s too sensitive now, over-stimulated. Sensations swirling, coiling, building inside her, different to the last. White lightning jolts along her nerves with every thrust and jerk of her lover’s hips, rapture so close she can taste it like burnt copper.

She sucks in the last of her air and then she explodes, finally, in a long and violent flare. A starburst that lasts an age and yet is gone too soon, leaving her bereft and whimpering through the aftermath. Too much, not enough,  _ more _ .

Lou collapses down next to her, when at last she’s had enough. Their sweat-sheened skin and trembling bodies close but not touching.

Lou catches her breath, snarls it out.

“Is that what you missed?”

Debbie is still high on her peak, up where the air is thin.

“Oh, you’ve no idea what it’s been like.”

The words carry more meaning than her flippant reply, smart in the face of Lou’s anger, and she regrets it instantly.  _ What it’s been like _ is aching and lonely and sore and raw and Debbie knows that she doesn’t have the monopoly on any of those feelings. Five years and more of hurt, twisting and cutting and chipping away at what they had. They are together but now they are brittle, Debbie realises.

There’s a pause while the sharp edges scratch inside her lover. Sarcasm, spite, truth.

“No, Debbie,  _ I have no idea _ . But you don’t get to walk back into my life like nothing’s changed, like you didn’t br-”.

Lou stops and snatches back what she’s about to say. Reforms it low and precise, as though the battlecries of a thousand furies aren’t trying to break loose from her lips.

“I’m not yours. To do with as you please.”

“I don’t think that.”

“You want me to jump back into your arms and into your bed and fuck away your mistakes.”

“You’re more than that to me, Lou.”

“Yeah. Part of your plan.”

“Part of my life.”

_ Love of my life _ , she doesn’t say. The knowledge is innate, a mantle of her being laid down over years. Half-hidden beneath the grime of her actions and the smoke of her lies, it glints achingly close.

Lou is burned, betrayed, having none of it.

“You always were a good bullshitter, Debbie.”

“And yet here you are.”

Lou lets out a loud and exasperated sigh, heavy with suffering.

“Here I am.  _ Partner _ .”

It will suffice.

Later, when she’s on her back again, Lou’s long body pressed tight against her and their fingers locked together and their hips working in slow concert and thick toy pushing into her over and over, she feels Lou’s breath hot in her ear. Feels it in the shape of an admission, while she’s hanging off the edge of oblivion.

_ Want you. Need you. Love you _ .

Words to signal a surrender.

But it’s Debbie that lays down the first atonement, a bloody crescent regret over Lou’s collarbone. Over the upside-down memory of another bite, so long ago.

They were young and hot-blooded, with the world at their feet and the future at their fingertips. Lou would hang on Debbie’s every word, stars in her eyes and heart in her mouth as Debbie dreamed a vague dream. It was always going to be the two of them; Debbie never talked or set out rules or made promises because  _ of course _ it was always going to be the two of them. And she never listened when Lou tried to make a promise anyway.

And then they grew up. They grew too familiar and too complacent and all the dreams turned to dust and stars became ash and the words they never said became bitter poisons.

What a fucking waste.

Debbie kisses her lover slow and hard and breaks upon the shore of a final, passionate orgasm. She curls into Lou’s side afterwards, seeking warmth, comfort, bravery. She can be brave.

“I’m so sorry, Lou.”

“You broke my heart. I gave you everything.”

“I didn’t deserve you. I  _ don’t _ deserve you.”

Lou’s quiet for only the rise and fall of a single breath.

“Nah. But you got me.”

Not forgiveness, but enough. Debbie nods, hot tears brimming and voice cracking.

“Let’s get you that diamond, baby.”

 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! Comments, feedback always welcome :)
> 
> If tumblr is your thing I am at @cosmotronic87


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